


talk some sense to me

by orphan_account



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-13
Updated: 2017-05-13
Packaged: 2018-10-31 09:38:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10896645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Everything they did, they did together, even down to getting arrested. That was why Monty couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that he wanted to live, and Jasper, Jasper of all god damn people, saw no point in it anymore.





	talk some sense to me

**Author's Note:**

> catch me ignoring all canon and giving jasper and monty the happy ending they deserve. this is short and a bit rushed but i needed to write some sort of fix-it fic, so here it is. this is unedited and was written at like 3am, so forgive me for any errors.

Monty couldn’t remember a time before it was _JasperandMonty_ , before everyone had come to see them as one unit, never one without the other. They had been inseparable since the day they met, and Monty’s entire life seemed to be a big blur of late nights, bad decisions, and _Jasper, Jasper, Jasper,_ ever-present. Monty could feel him underlying everything, like a heartbeat, sure and steady and grounding. 

They had raised each other, grown up on the same wavelength, running the same halls, and going with along with each and every one of each other’s terrible plans. Everything they did, they did together, even down to getting arrested. That was why Monty couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that he wanted to live, and Jasper, _Jasper_ of all god damn people, saw no point in it anymore. 

Of course Monty was aware that Jasper had been a different person ever since Mount Weather; a shadow of who he used to be, all his soft edges gone with his messy hair. He knew Jasper talked and joked and yelled about giving up. He had dealt with it first hand enough times. He was more than familiar with the feeling the Jasper’s words brought to him, the painful lurch in his stomach every time Jasper’s eyes lit up at the mention of the death wave.

Even so, it had never really registered until he stepped into the room and saw the cup in Jasper’s hand that, when it came down to it, Jasper was completely serious about it all. He felt stupid for not even considering what Riley’s overdose would do to Jasper, what ideas it would give him. He should've known. 

Monty was frozen in the doorway, not quite processing what he was seeing, until Jasper started to raise the cup to his lips. Monty’s stomach dropped, his mind on overdrive, and he lurched forward, an arm reaching out to swat the cup from Jasper’s hand. It clattered to the ground between them and dark liquid sloshed out onto their feet. “Jasper, what the hell?” 

Jasper barely flinched, and for a long moment his eyes stayed focused on where his cup had been in his hand. He turned his head slowly, eyes finding Monty’s, and he smirked. “Well, I _was_ about to make things a hell of a lot easier for myself _and_ you. Now I’m gonna have to refill my cup.” Jasper reached down to grab for his cup and Monty’s hand shot out and clamped around his wrist.

“You’re not doing this.” Monty said, grip tightening as Jasper tried to wrench his arm away.

“Oh, I’m not? And who’s going to stop me— you?” Jasper barked out a laugh. “You overestimate yourself, Monty.”

The comment stung, but Monty refused to let it get under his skin. He didn’t have the time, and this wasn’t about him. “No…but I won't underestimate you. I _know_ this isn’t what you want. I know this isn’t you.” 

Jasper laughed again, a dark and emotionless thing, and dropped his head to stare at the floor. “And who exactly am I? Because I certainly don’t fucking know. What I do know is that if you hadn’t so rudely interrupted me,” Jasper tried once again to jerk his arm from Monty’s grasp, sighing dramatically when Monty held firm, “this could all be over by now.”

Monty was sick at the thought. He had been so close to losing Jasper. He probably still was. Jasper was right on the edge this entire time, and Monty’s unwavering optimism had kept him from really seeing it for what it was. Through all of Jasper’s cruel jokes and talk of death, Monty still held onto some naive hope that that they would always be _JasperandMonty_ , that Jasper would always come back to him. If not for himself, then for Monty. He felt selfish even thinking it.

Monty pulled at Jasper’s wrist, dragging him closer and placing his free hand on Jasper’s shoulder. He wanted as much contact as possible with Jasper, needed to remind himself that, yes, he was still here. He didn’t let himself focus on the “ _For now._ ” itching at the back of his mind. His chest was tight with worry, the familiar tendrils of anxiety making their way up his chest, into his throat, and the careless look on Jasper’s face didn’t help at all. He tried to catch Jasper’s gaze. He needed Jasper to _see_ him. “Don’t do this to me. Please, let me help you.”

Jasper scoffed. “God, Monty, don’t get you get it? I don’t want your help! I don’t _need_ your help! This—” Jasper gestured frantically to the cup and the liquid still pooled beneath their shoes, “is what I need. Let me have this.”

Monty’s heart clenched painfully and he could feel the sting of tears threatening to spill over in his eyes. His fingers slipped down from Jasper’s wrist and wrapped around his trembling fingers. A small sob escaped Jasper’s throat. 

“I couldn’t have Maya, I couldn’t have y—” Jasper stuttered over his words, seeming to catch himself, and took a deep breath. “I couldn’t have Maya. Let me get what I want for once. Just once.”

Monty shuddered out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and his hand on Jasper’s shoulder reached up cup one side of his face. “There’s more that you want. And even if there isn’t, there can be. Let me help you find it. Please, Jasper,” Monty choked out, “I can’t lose you. You’re…you’re pretty much all I have left.” Monty thought guiltily of Harper, of how, regardless of the love he had for her, the thought of losing her paled in comparison to the thought of losing Jasper.

Jasper tensed beneath his hands. “Yeah. _Pretty much_.” He spit out bitterly. He gave one final tug and pulled himself from Monty’s grasp. Jasper’s eyes scanned the room until they landed on his tea and he started forward. “Like I already told you, you’re not enough to stop me.” Jasper said, an echo of Harper’s earlier words. Monty didn’t even need to think about which ones hurt worse. “And it’s not like I’d be enough to stop anybody, either.” Jasper added, almost an afterthought.

“Jasper, you _can’t—_ ”

“Why can’t I, Monty?” Jasper seethed, whirling around to face Monty again. “What is it with you and making decisions for me? First Mount Weather and now this. Why can’t I make this one decision for myself? Why—”

Monty didn't have time to consider his next words before he was shouting, “Because I love you, you idiot!” His voice cracked despite himself. “Because I’m in fucking love with you and if you’re gonna do this, if you’re really gonna do this, then I guess you’re gonna have to take me with you!”

A deafening silence settled over the room and all Monty could hear was the steady _thump, thump, thump_ of his heart beating erratically in his chest. Jasper looked dumbstruck, his mouth opening and closing as if to speak, but he seemed unable to form words.

“I—you—Harper.” Jasper stuttered out.

Monty stepped forward cautiously, relieved when Jasper didn’t flinch or back away, and gently cupped either side of Jasper’s face. He steeled himself, but held Jasper’s gaze. “It’s you, Jasper. It’s always been you.”

Jasper sucked in a breath, his eyes searching Monty’s face. After a moment, Jasper seemed to find what he was looking for, and something in his face shifted. He paused for only a second and then rocked forward and caught Monty’s mouth with his own. It was nowhere near smooth or graceful, which was unsurprising coming from Jasper, but all of that was lost on Monty. All he could think of was the feeling of Jasper’s lips on his, Jasper’s hands coming up to tangle in his hair, his hands gripping Jasper’s hips. Monty gasped for breath in between frantic kisses, a whirlwind of emotions swirling through him too fast to keep track.

Suddenly, and all too soon, Jasper pulled away. His lips were red and kiss-swollen, his eyes hooded, and he looked more vulnerable than Monty ever thought possible for Jasper. His heart stuttered at the sight.

“You love me?” Jasper asked, voice raw with emotion. 

Monty was too far gone to even try to backtrack or deny it. He didn’t want to deny this boy anything. “I—yeah. Yeah, I love you.”

“And what about Harper?”

Monty swallowed and looked away. He was silent for a long moment before responding. “I love her, I do.” It wasn’t a lie. What he felt for Harper was real and it hurt him to think about it, but what he felt for Jasper consumed him completely. He reached out to grab Jasper’s hand again. “But I’m _in love_ with you. Have been for a while now.” Jasper’s lips twitched at the corners, the closest to a smile that Monty had seen from him in months.“We do everything together, Jasper. Always have. I don’t plan on changing that now.”

Jasper took another breath and shook his head. He squeezed Monty’s hand. “I thought I was the stubborn one.” 

Monty pulled Jasper forward buried his face in his neck, inhaling his scent. It was nothing new, but this time, being this close to Jasper felt overwhelming. “Stay, Jas.” He whispered into his skin, and Jasper shuddered. “Please stay with me.”

They stood there, holding each other, breathing each other in, for what felt like an eternity. Tension slowly eased out of Jasper’s shoulders, but Monty could tell he was crying now. It occurred to Monty that this was the first time he had held Jasper, really held him, since Mount Weather. Something that used to be second nature now felt so foreign to him, but now that he had the feeling back he never wanted to let it go.

After what felt like hours, Jasper finally pulled back a bit and looked up, red-rimmed eyes finding Monty’s. He trembled under Monty’s hands, but still, he nodded. It was barely a movement, something easily missed, but to Monty it felt monumental. He sagged into Jasper, gripping him tighter, muttering “I love you, I love you, I love you,” under his breath like a mantra. Each time he said it, Jasper seemed to pull him impossibly closer. 

Monty finally felt like he could breathe, if only for a moment. Jasper was here, he was safe. Monty hadn’t lost him yet. 


End file.
